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My Failed Relationships Haven’t Given Me Trust Issues, Nor Should Yours

If you are afraid of failure, chances are that you are never going to find true love in your life. When we fall in love with someone, we give them the whole of us. Sadly, it’s not necessary that our relationship is going to last forever. Too often, our heart gets broken and that too in the most devastating way. Sometimes, we don’t get a closure and are required to carry on without getting any consolation at all. We don’t get anything to hold on to, which makes us question the mere foundation of love.

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We stop trusting people and confine our heart in a box. We do it to keep it safe. Though, in the process, it loses the essence of it. It might keep beating by supplying blood to your organs, but there won’t be any sense of life in it at all. Your heart would forget how to love. The happiness that was once a part of your life would slowly become a figment of your imagination.


Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License

There comes a time in our life when we need to take a leap of faith. It might seem like the most reckless move, especially after experiencing a few failed relationships. But we should do it. When it comes to love, we should always take a leap of faith. It will either take you where you belong or you would learn how to fly. There is this thing about failed relationships – it takes plenty of things from you. It might take away your sense of self-worth and dignity. You might willingly give your joy and happiness away to it. Though, there is one thing that a failed relationship will always rob you off – trust.

When my heart got broken and that too in the most merciless way – I thought I was done. For me, that was my one and only chance and I didn’t want to feel the same way ever again. There was a part of me that was reluctant to fall in love. I was a little hesitant because I didn’t want to be hurt again. Nevertheless, it didn’t give me trust issues. I fell in love again and even though it didn’t work out, I moved on with a smile on my face. Yes, there were nights when I cried my eyes out but that was all a part of life. It made me whole again.

I fell in and out of love a few times and had some failed relationships. Every time, I came out of it, I learned something new. It was like as if every time my heart got broken, it made me a little stronger. I have no regrets. I would do it again in a heartbeat because it made me who I’m. I don’t get trust issues because I know why it didn’t work out for me. I exactly know where I lacked or the kind of things I should have done differently in my past relationships to make it work. I can blame my trust for it, but I don’t. I was quite mature when I fell in love. I knew better than just trusting people like that. I blame myself for every failed relationship of mine. Not the person or the situation – and especially not my trust. It was me, it has always been me. And it is absolutely fine because one day I will make it work.

man thinking_New_Love_Times

Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License

If you have been in a failed relationship, doubting your trust is the most obvious thing to do. You should never have trust issues after falling out of love. You should have no issues at all. Instead of remembering all those bad parts, think of the good ones as well. It was your trust that gave you some of the most memorable moments of your life. I can’t let go of them and neither should you.

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The worst decision is to make no decision at all.

If you will keep on having trust issues, you won’t fall in love again. You would always judge people on the basis of a few parameters that were set by your ex. You will stop yourself from falling in love. You won’t be able to decide anything.

“Should I take a step forward and take a chance on love or should I give it more time?”

You would just keep asking yourself the same question time and time again until the opportunity would be gone. Just like the last time, you would blame yourself for it. There is nothing wrong with you. You just gotta trust your gut feeling. It can never be wrong.

Only love can mend a broken heart.

couple in love_New_Love_Times

Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License

A lot of people think that after having a bad relationship, they will never find love again. They stop themselves from taking a leap of faith. They don’t look out or meet other people. It is okay to give yourself some time. That is how you are going to heal, right? But you can’t simply stay the same way forever. Sooner or later, you need to put your heart out of that box and set it free.

Set it free – because it will take you where you belong. You might think that you are broken hearted and that nothing in this world can make you whole again. You are wrong. Only love can make you whole. I know, it sounds ironic. How can something like love mend the damage, when it was the initial perpetrator?

Because it was not the same kind of love that broke your heart. Love doesn’t have two sides. It’s not white or black. It has a whole spectrum.

“There are all kinds of love in the world, but never the same love twice.”

― F. Scott Fitzgerald

Just because someone broke your heart, doesn’t mean that it can’t be whole again. It takes love to cure love. You will fall in love again, but in a different way.

We never fall in love with a feeling or an idea. We always fall in love with a person. You fell in love for the first time with someone else. The next time would be different. You would be a whole new person and would be able to experience it in a different way. No two individuals are identical. Similarly, you don’t fall in love with people the same way over and over again. It’s always different. Sometimes – well, most of the times, it is even better.

If you will keep having trust issues, you won’t be able to know how amazing it can be to fall in love again. Yes, it won’t be the same, but that is the beauty of it. It would be like experiencing something for the first time – all over again. Give it a try!

Have some faith in the universe.


Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License

I strongly believe in the power of the universe. I have had a few failed relationships in the past, but I never let that destroy me. And trust me – I have seen people getting destroyed in love. You have to make yourself believe that the universe will always have a bigger plan for you than you have for yourself. If you keep holding on to your ideas and how you want your life to be, you might end up where you want. But if you believe in the universe, you will end up where you deserve.

It’s okay to have trust issues just after facing a setback in your life. But overcoming those issues in the most crucial thing! Whenever you have a doubt – simply close your eyes and listen to your heart. That is your motive. That is the sound of the universe, trying to communicate with you. Have some faith in it. Let it guide you home and overcome your issues.

Love unconditionally.


Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License

Every time I gave love, I expected something in return. I took me a while to realize that my love was not unconditional. It was the root cause of my trust issues. If I had given the kind of unconditional love that gives all those poets an inspiration to write, my failed relationship would have never broken my trust. To love is to be vulnerable. I should have simply given my heart and soul out to her, without expecting anything in return. The moment I thought of getting something from her, I put my trust on the line. I can’t blame her for breaking my trust. I blame myself.

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Now, I know better. I have forgiven myself. I don’t have trust issues because it wasn’t anyone’s fault. I got hurt and it was because of me that my trust became a collateral damage. I won’t do it again. I know how it feels like to be broken. Ironically, it took me a broken heart to realize how good it feels to be whole.

I don’t know how my future is going to be, but I’m certainly open to the idea of love. I believe in the existence of love and I know one day, I’m going to find it.

True love exists.

I believe in it and you should too. Don’t let your trust issues take away your chance of happiness. True love will come into your life. You just gotta be ready for it.

Featured image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License

Article Name
My Failed Relationships Haven't Given Me Trust Issues, Nor Should Yours
Because failed relationships prepare you to succeed- and you gotta try!
Bhavya Kaushik

Bhavya Kaushik

A national bestselling author, Bhavya believes that too often the stories we write paint the reality we try to escape from. Bhavya believes in breaking the stereotypes and trying new things because life is too short to let it stay boring. With his love for verse, he can be found avidly blogging about life, love and everything that covers in between. He lives his life by the motto, 'I'm the story of my own journey.' "I don't write stories. I write characters."