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#ScienceSpeaks Science Lays Out The Biggest Relationship Deal Breakers

So what is your dating deal breaker? Bad breath? Poor personal hygiene? Anger issues? Alcohol and/or substance abuse? Physical abuse? What makes or breaks a relationship is quite subjective. What might be a deal breaker for one, might make it a bonding experience for another.

But, there are certain things that are almost universal in them being dating deal breakers. A recent study published in the journal Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin has shortlisted the top 10 most common deal breakers for short- and long-term relationships.

man talking on the phone while on a date_New_Love_Times

Image source: Shutterstock

Take a look:

Top 10 deal breakers for short-term relationships

  1. Has health issues or STDs
  2. Smells
  3. Has poor hygiene
  4. Is married or already in another relationship
  5. Is currently dating multiple people
  6. Has anger issues or is abusive
  7. Isn’t good in bed
  8. Isn’t attractive
  9. Is racist or bigoted
  10. Doesn’t take care of themselves

Top 10 deal breakers for long-term relationships

  1. Has anger issues or is abusive
  2. Is dating multiple people
  3. Isn’t trustworthy
  4. Is married or already in another relationship
  5. Has health issues or STDs
  6. Has an alcohol or drug problem
  7. Isn’t attentive or caring
  8. Dismisses your interests
  9. Has poor hygiene
  10. Smells

If you look at the two lists of relationship deal breakers closely, you’ll notice that health issues and STDs figure higher for short-term relationships than in the long-term list. People in similar situations may get along better than those who have no idea about them.

Suggested read: Manspreading makes one more attractive when dating

Similarly, having poor hygiene and smelling figure at the bottom of the list when people are seeking longer-term relationships rather than a short fling. People’s priorities change depending on where they are at in their own lives, what they’re looking for in the relationship, and how much they can overlook to get what they want.

According to the study, impulsivity is another deal breaker, which didn’t make it to the top 10. This will be a serious deal breaker for those looking for stability, yet hold enticing appeal for someone who needs more excitement in their life.

In a press release, Gregory Webster, an associate professor of psychology at University of Florida and one of the study’s authors, explained that a person’s positive traits are eclipsed by negative qualities when you’re interested in them. And we can thank evolution for this tendency to pick up on threats above and beyond neutral and pleasant aspects of a person. This is how our ancestors chose their mates overlooking the qualities that interfered with child rearing and other safety concerns that could hinder our species’ survival.

According to Webster, guys and gals naturally weed out people they don’t hit it off with from their pool of potential partners. But if you’re not too sure about how to go about doing this weeding, you may want to listen to your gut, instead of settling for someone who looks great on paper but is a jerk in real life.

Talking about this, Webster said,

“A lot of times, just by avoiding negative traits, people will probably be fairly well off – maybe even more well off – than if they were trying to optimize the best potential partner.”

Compromise is key for any successful, healthy relationship, but not at the cost of you feeling unsafe or having to settle for something less than you can deal with. So pay attention to what you really can’t deal with. At the same time, don’t expect your ‘ideal man’ for every short- or long-term relationship you consider. You’ll just make yourself and the other person miserable.

Featured image source: Shutterstock

Article Name
Science Lays Out The Biggest Relationship Deal Breakers
Everyone has their own relationship deal breakers. And a new study has compiled a list of deal breakers for short- and long-term relationships. Take a look.
Chaitra Ramalingegowda

Chaitra Ramalingegowda

I fell in love with storytelling long before I knew what it was. Love well written stories, writing with passion, baking lip-smacking-finger-licking chocolate cakes, engaging movies, and home-cooked food. A true work-in-progress and a believer in the idiom 'all those who wander are not lost'. Twitter: @ChaitraRlg