Ever since Adam and Eve, man has been struggling with the burning question – “What is it that women want?” To figure out what women think and want has been an epic struggle of mankind ever since life started on Earth (or perhaps even before that!). The basic reason behind this confusion is the fact that men and women process thoughts and emotions in drastically different ways.
Research has indicated that women base their decision making thoughts on emotions 30% more than their male counterparts. Women are also more intuitive than men, and also communicate differently. So inherently there has always been confusion about what women like, especially in their men, and what men think women like in men.
Suggested read: What are the qualities in men that modern women desire?
So here’s an attempt at decoding what women like in men:
1. The tongue matters
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Not just while kissing! You need to be a fairly decent conversationalist with a fair share of humor. Use of one too many slangs is going to intimidate and overwhelm her for sure. Organize your thoughts well and create conversations around interesting topics to keep her invested in the conversation. Converse in the language that you are confident in, there’s nothing more annoying than bad diction or wrong use of language.
2. Not just the tongue, the ears matter too!
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Women love to talk and pour their hearts out. After a hectic day, they want to share everything with the one they love and trust the most. They confide in you because they trust you and they know that you will make them feel better. Sometimes all a woman needs is to be heard. Someone to just lend them a patient ear and tell them, “I understand,” or “I am here for you.” She is going to love adore you for really listening to her. One more thing to note here is that, she is not looking to you for solutions to her problems, unless she explicitly asks for it. She just wants you to really listen, not just hear her talking.
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3. Let’s settle it once and for all – they don’t care about your abs
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Let’s be clear here; this doesn’t mean that women won’t be eyeing a muscular body running in front of them on the beach. They will ogle, they will fantasize, but they really don’t care if their man has a chiseled body or not. A woman is much more concerned about how the person is in reality rather than how he looks on the outside. They do prefer men who have a good body because it shows that you take care of yourself. A well-groomed and healthy man is much more appealing to a woman than a man with great abs but who is extremely unkempt and to top it off, has a body odor problem. Ewww! So take a holistic approach about your looks and don’t obsess about those six-packs.
4. Show them your travels, and not your gadgets and cars
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So you got the latest iPhone and then upgraded it to some super specialized model? Well, guess what? Women don’t really care! Women are much more interested in knowing about your experiences and adventures and travels rather than your latest gadgets and cars. So tell them about you, your adventures, your experiences, how you saved the little kitty from the tree, your favorite destinations and what you like about them, the new cuisine you tried, a new book you read, your favorite song and what made you the man you are today. We never were and never will be interested in “bat-mobile” so we really don’t care if your car resembles one very closely. Seriously!
Note: Granted that there are women out there who would be obsessed about the stats of the newest bat mobile than you, but they are a rarity. If you find such a woman, lucky you; but don’t expect every girl you meet to be as nerdy as you – just FYI.
5. Women observe mannerisms like kindergarten teachers
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Good manners and etiquette are what women like in men, even more than good looks and intelligence. A recent poll revealed that women picked well-mannered men as partners more predominantly than better-looking or intelligent men. Eight out of ten women questioned in the survey commissioned by Debrett’s believed than men need to improve their manners. It is very important to them that their partner is well-mannered and is well-versed with the social etiquette and niceties. They observe how men behave in any given social situation very keenly. Your knife and fork finesse, how you order your food, how you primp yourself, your cell phone etiquette, how you hold your liquor, your ways of dealing with the wait staff – everything is under x-ray scrutiny. So make sure you practice them as a general rule and not just to impress a woman, because if there is one thing that women loathe more than bad etiquette, it’s a fake man.
Suggested read: Do the rules of chivalry hold meaning in the 21st century?
6. Chivalry is a gorgeous thing!
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However empowered and independent women might be, they are fans of chivalry. They love to feel special, loved and needed, and long for kindness without a reason. Chivalry is an important criterion they have when they judge you. They measure your interest in them with the amount of chivalry they see in you, and also pick out the good guys from among the lot based on this. Few acts of chivalry that will surely take you closer to your lady are: opening the door for the lady, pulling out her chair, giving her a hand while climbing stairs, offering her your jacket if its chilly outside, caring about her opinion and showing respect, making sure she gets home safe, walking her to the door, calling her when you say you will – in short, being a true gentleman.
Now that you’ve read through the list, do you think men and women are really that different? Tell us in the comments!
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