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What’s A Hopeless Romantic And Why Are They Considered Hopeless?

Are you in love with love? Have you stacked Mills & Boon romances in your drawer? Can your capacity to watch romcoms be described as a super power? Does the idea of receiving flowers (read: roses) get you more psyched than winning a lottery?

If you said “yes” to all those accusations, don’t be sorry at all! You are just another hopeless romantic like me! Wait, but what’s a hopeless romantic?  

Well, for that, and any other information regarding someone who says “aww” and actually means it, read this portion we brewed just for you!

Speaking in the common tongue, a hopeless romantic is a person who bases any relationship trusting their instinct, and the way they perceive the vibes between them and their partner.

Suggested read: 11 struggles of being a smart, independent woman, AND a hopeless romantic

You might say, “But this is the way everyone views a relationship, right?” Well, how would you know that this is an exceedingly utopian (read: naïve!) idea of love! This is the way a hopeless romantic looks at love: A package full of epic starry-eyed gestures, fairy-tal-ish love-at-first-sights, knight-in-shining-armors, and happily-ever-afters!

mr darcy_New_Love_Times

Image source: Pinterest 

What’s a hopeless romantic to the world?

Because of our hopeful nature, our critics dub our romantic indulgences as hopelessness, and us as fools. Though our dreams and expectations may seem a tad bit unrealistic, we don’t let that keep us from hoping these reveries will come true, someday, somehow.

Mild distraction: Don’t you find it tongue-in-cheek how we are so full of hope, and yet people call us hopeless! But even that won’t get us down, will it?!

The hopeless romantics are inclusive people. Unlike believers of other things, we think everyone is a hopeless romantic at heart, whether they accept it or not!

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Image source: Pinterest 

Are hopeless romantics starry-eyed suckers only in love?

Well, no. Though we may seem idealistic, particularly about, everything that is love, we are also, miserably optimistic, about life in general! We are innate hopers! If you think the people who say the glass is half-full are optimistic, listen to our take on it: We think, since the glass contains 50% water and 50% air, it is always full-full and not half-full! 😉

Now you will believe me that it was one of us who came up with “the best is yet to happen.”

Are we the fools who rush in love, like Elvis once crooned?

Yes, that is how the cynics think of us! But we have our set of expectations from a relationship, and so we can be choosy too! 😉

Here’s what we expect of a relationship:

We, hopeless romantics, have severely high standards when it comes to loving and being loved. Some people may be content with some simple expressions and gestures of love. But we need something more than that. We prefer to raise the bar by seeking something far more exclusive and performed with a great amount of effort!

There may not be any guarantee that we will receive what we are expecting, but this does not stop us from hoping. We believe in Rumi’s words, “What you seek is seeking you.”

Suggested read: Love addiction is REAL: 8 unmistakable signs of a love addict

Is being a hopeless romantic a bad thing?

Let’s give our critics a chance to give their points too. They think that some romantics are hopeless, because more than often, the search for ‘true love,’ does not yield anything, and that it is our sky-high expectations which should be blamed for the same.

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Image source: Pinterest 

While we keep looking for, what we proudly call, “The One,” and believe in that one special gesture, which will give away his or her identity, we overlook a number of imperfectly perfect people in our lives who can love us more than our ideal soul mate!

“Hopeless romantics do sketch a pretty picture of a life they want to live, but they tend to be a little lax on the idea of going out and getting it, because they are not willing to change the way they see things,” said a friend during one of our ‘heart-storming’ sessions.

He continued, “Every epic romance begins like a seed sown in the ground. It has to be watered, and given enough sunlight and shade. Only when taken care of and tended to it, does it blossom…”

Yeah, he has a way with words! But he also has a point, don’t you think? When we are deep into our search for a love that is perfect, we forget that it is our efforts that can stir up even the most mundane of love stories, and turn it perfect.

People, in recent years, have constantly raised the bar when looking for a life partner, say researchers. Unluckily for most, these standards are just not feasible for a mere mortal, because most of them are based on fantasy characters, out of Nicholas Sparks’ novels!

For instance, an awfully luxurious date is impossible for people who are struggling to make ends meet. This failure is sure to reflect on the person’s inability to provide the same in the long term, which is wrongly translated as an inability to make the other half feel special. This whole web of expectations v. reality hits hard, and it ruins the chance that the couple could, put in efforts, in the more essential aspects of the relationship, and love on!

Is a being a hopeless romantic a good thing?

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Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License

For the hopeless romantics like me, there is a silver lining of hope! Having high standards in a relationship is a brilliant thing, says another group of researchers, but the couple should be willing to work at it, together, to realize those standards.

In my opinion, being a hopeless romance lover is not an unhealthy thing at all. It has proved to be great for a number of couples. Yes, one has to tone down one’s expectations, but only when your lover cannot rub a genie, with a magic carpet, out of a lamp! (Yeah, that does not happen. Yeah, I know. ;))

The best thing, which is part and parcel of being a hopeless romantic, is that we are an awesome catch! We not only know what we want from our partner and from our relationship with them, but also how much we are willing to love (which is a lotttt!). If you don’t trust us, dear skeptic, ask our friends and family (and our neighbors too). The endless supply of genuine love and acknowledgement that we shower them with is crazy, but in a good way!

Do hopeless romantics have a happy ending?

couple in love_New_Love_Times

Image source: Pixabay, under Creative Commons License

We, hopeless romantics, are both envied and pitied, at the same time. We are envied because our perspective of the world makes people see everybody in the best light. We only see goodness in everyone. Also, we know what we want, and we are not willing to let go of our beliefs and faiths. We want to see ourselves with a S.O. who is marvelous and exceptional. We feel in our hearts that we can have that man or woman as our partner, and so are ready to be patient and wait long enough from them to arrive.

Sadly, we are pitied too. Some of us are so wedded to the idea of finding the ‘perfect match,’ that our search does not come to a halt… ever! This happens because we are looking for someone who does not exist, and so, is unattainable. Because of how movies, and now the social media, portray serendipity and fate, we hopeless romantics, have ended up wishing for someone, the idea of whom was pre-planned by someone else!

If you are expecting “Notting Hill” to happen to you or a Christian Grey to walk into your life, you are up for some serious disappointment. These are exceptional cases, and denial will only make things worse!

Being a hopeless romantic, you are looking in the right direction, but your heart is likely to take you down a wrong path, at times. Happy endings don’t wait at the end of a straight line. There is this superbly confusing maze of sentiments and emotions and feelings that you will have to jump through with your partner. Only after crossing those hurdles, hand-in-hand, can you get the fairy tale ending you have always dreamt of.

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Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License

The romantics, who are not hopeless, are absolutely right in not entertaining themselves with unachievable standards. However, they are also losing in this bargain for not expecting the best from their relationships. They are not even realizing that they deserve the best! Yes, getting the prince or the belle of ball is unrealistic and far-fetched, but not hoping for someone who loves you more than they love themselves? Come-on! Only when you believe you deserve it, will you have taken the first step in achieving it!

Suggested read: Do you want to know what girls want? Just love, of the true kind

So if you don’t want to be hopeless or too complacent, no pressures! Just be a romantic! I have found myself at both the ends of this spectrum, at different points in my life. Yes, I have been a hopeless romantic with a broken heart, like you, yes, you, reading this. And here’s what I have to say to you: Let us keep doing what we do best. Let’s love with all our hearts. Let’s spread joy to all those we care for, and never give up on the idea that if it is not a happy ending, the movie hasn’t ended yet! :)

So, what’s a hopeless romantic? He or she is someone who resembles you! 😉 Now that you have realized your super power (love, waddup!), you need to celebrate it, and also harness it for it to grow. How do you do that? By subscribing to our newsletter for a daily dose of this magical potion, love! See ya until next time. Love and be loved! 😉

Featured image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License

Article Name
What's A Hopeless Romantic And Why Are They Considered Hopeless?
What's a hopeless romantic? Someone who believes life=love. Does that ring a bell? Read more if you believe in fairy tale beginnings, endings & in-betweens!
Riya Roy

Riya Roy

“If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a little faster.” This Isaac Asimov line, embraces my love for writing in the finest and most desperate way that it is and should be! I was tormented by the earnestness of the written word not very early in my journey. But once smitten, it has helped me devour life twice over; savoring the moment and indulging in its memories. As a flâneuse, I wander to understand the intricacies of human relationships. Realizing that, they are just different manifestations of the same feeling of love, has been my greatest learning. I seek to share its opulence through the words I type.