The thing about best friends is that they know you too well and you aren’t afraid to be yourself with them. You don’t fear being judged and you don’t have to pretend to be something you’re not. That said, best friends are like your backbone as well; they hold you together when you are broken. Most friends refer to their relationship with their best friend as “two peas in a pod,” which is another way to describe how well you two fit together. Sometimes, I look at some of my girlfriends and secretly wish to marry them because our relationship is already so perfect.
When I began dating my boyfriend, we were anything but best friends (I’ll be honest!). The intention was to purely date and was romantic in nature. But as we got to know each other over time, our friendship developed alongside our romantic relationship. Apart from the good rapport we shared, we were extremely comfortable with each other and could talk to one another about anything under the sun. We chatted for hours together, tried every new restaurant in town, had similar opinions on most topics, we could laugh at anything and everything, and above all, we were just comfortable in our own skin with each other. We didn’t have to pretend around each other and we got accustomed to each other rather rapidly. So one fine day, when we decided to tie the knot, I understood why marrying your best friend is such great advice.
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It was a dream come true. Now I have another best friend, but with even more benefits. Most people often say that you should marry your best friend. I cannot agree more; there are so many perks to marrying your best friend. Here are a few I could count:
1. Unrestricted conversations
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Sometimes you have to be careful about what you say so you don’t look foolish, immature, or downright silly, but not with your best friend. Have you noticed that you often speak your mind with your best friend without worrying for a moment whether they will misunderstand you? You feel free to say whatever you want, there are absolutely no restrictions. So when you marry your best friend, you don’t have to worry about keeping the content or the language clean. My husband and I can talk about anything with each other without holding ourselves back. So our banter involves an honest, unbiased, and unfiltered take on every topic. It’s easy to talk to people when you know they will understand you and not judge you.
2. The inside jokes
We all have those jokes which are shared amongst the limited people we are congenial with. If you have married your best friend, you often giggle together about an inside joke between just the two of you. You spend time imitating that funny person or a person you both despise. Over the years that we have been married, we have plenty of these jokes and we often find ourselves grinning sheepishly in public. When people ask us “what’s so funny,” they are politely told “it’s nothing,” with a smirk. 😉
3. Hanging out is fun
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Although it’s nice to hit up a bar with a few friends on a Friday night, sometimes we really can do without the extras. It’s as much fun as hanging out with a bunch of people, because it’s not the number of people that make a gathering fun but the kind of conversations you can have with a few people. So when you have married your best friend, nothing changes. You are still able to hang out with your partner without needing those extra people. Unlike some couples you see in restaurants that are eating their meal in complete silence without even looking at each other, the scenario at a restaurant with your best friend will often include eating from each other’s plates and lots of chatting!
4. Resolving a conflict in no time
Yeah, so you do have your differences and those petty fights. Everyone does and if you don’t, then you surely have an even bigger problem at hand. But with your best friend, you can’t stay mad at each other for too long. So, you inevitably end up sorting your differences because if you don’t, then you miss your best friend. I’ve never stayed angry for too long at my bestie, because in less than an hour’s time, I want to talk to them about something that just took place in my life. So I end up patching things up with them almost immediately. The same happens with my husband, we just can’t seem to be angry with each other for more than 3 hours in a day. Because, if we do, we tend to miss each other and that’s worse than being mad at each other.
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5. Constructive and honest feedback
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I’d rather have someone criticize me than flatter me. Who else could do that apart from your best friend? Sometimes you need that one person to tell you things without making it look rosy. This person offers you that practical advice and the perspective to look at things black and white. The advantage here is that you won’t mind it when such feedback comes from someone that is close to you. If your partner is your best friend, you will get all these benefits and more from them.
6. Matching wavelengths and common interests
Being stuck with someone who doesn’t get your jokes or cannot relate to you can be a curse! And what if you have nothing in common, while you like east your partner loves the west? Seems like a perfect recipe for disaster (might not be true in all cases because sometimes it’s the opposites that attract – we all know that!). But, on the contrary, it’s vital that you both have at least one or two common interests for a smooth and steady marriage. You see, “birds of the same feather flock together”.
7. No explanation required
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If I had to explain and validate every one of my actions to my husband, I’d probably spend my entire day doing just that. Thus, when your partner is your best friend, they understand you and do not need justification from you regarding your every move. You just instinctively know why they did a certain thing. There is a certain comfort level you both share and you know each other so well that there is no need for an explanation. Imagine having to justify every single thing you do to your partner? That would kill anyone mentally.
8. The ability to pull each other up
We all need that one person who is capable of lifting up our spirits when we are down. Down with work pressure, family issues, mental health, loss of a dear one, or any other challenge, your best friend will know exactly what to say and do to get you out of these emotionally binding situations. They know very well how to cheer you up and help you move on. So when you are marrying your best friend, you are entitled to all these perks. Your best friend is someone who you rely on extensively in your time of need and this person plays a fundamental role in helping you deal with emotional and sensitive issues. So, when either of you is facing life’s challenges, the other ensures that they help you figure out a way around the issue.
9. No surprises
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Since you already know this person, you are not going to worry about the skeletons in their closet. It is rightly said that a known devil is better than an unknown angel because you can predict the other person’s intentions and moves. Life becomes easy and stress free. Your expectations will also remain intact and you will hardly be disappointed. A pleasant surprise is always better than a rude shock. And because you have known your best friend for a while, you know everything about them and nothing will startle you.
10. There’s no adjusting
I say this, because you are way past that adjusting phase, as this was done in the initial months that you got to know your best friend. Getting used to each other’s habits and learning each other’s preferences and tastes are all things of the past. Now, you both are just so comfortable with each other that you are prepared for anything and everything. The first few months of any marriage are difficult because you are adjusting to the other person, but this doesn’t happen when you marry your best friend because all that has been done long ago. From now on, it’s just smooth sailing.
Your best friend will always create a sense of belonging in the relationship and because you have known each other for a long duration, everything’s just too simple and can be handled easily. Getting into a relationship with a new person or an unknown person has a whole set of challenges because, everything is new and not everything that is new is always nice!
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