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34 Irrational Thoughts Every Woman Has When Visiting Her Gynaecologist

So all of us ladies have to take the dreaded gyno-trip once in a while and let’s just say it is not the most fun. And that’s just a polite understatement. Tbh, IT SUCKS. Men are so lucky that they don’t have vaginas that are probed by random strangers.

Suggested read: Thoughts every girl has when her boyfriend makes her angry

But hey, can’t do much about it other than suck it up and bear with it to know everything is fine down there, right? But the visit to the gynecologist isn’t without a ton of irrational thoughts flooding your brainscape, especially if you’ve avoided going for years and it is your first time. Take a look:

  • Ok, it is completely fine. She’s a trained professional. You can do this. Deep breaths.


Image source: Tumblr

  • No, really. I don’t even do so much prep down there when I am expecting to get laid! She better feel lucky. What am I even saying?
  • What if my vajayjay doesn’t look normal? What is a normal vag even supposed to look like? What if mine is weird? Is it supposed to look like those pretty versions we see in porn?
  • I wish I could at least SEE my vag.
  • Look at her smiling at me like she isn’t just going to look down my cervix!
  • What should I do? Should I just go lay in the cold bed? Should I sit in the chair? SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT TO DO!
  • Oh wow, look at her making small talk. I don’t want to talk about how my brother is doing, thank you very much. Can’t we just get over with it?


Image source: yebohe

  • Oh great. Now she’s asking if I am married – to know about my sex life.
  • No, I am not married. Yes, I am sexually active. *followed by stunned silence*
  • Wow, thanks, you judgmental human.
  • Why do I have to sit on the cold metal chair? I’m sure there have been a hundred naked women up there. Ew.
  • Okay, here we go.


Image source: Tumblr

  • Uhm, ok. That metal thing inside my vajayjay doesn’t feel weird AT ALL.
  • She says it’s going to hurt a little. What a liar.
  • I am just going to look at the ceiling now.
  • And pretend nothing is happening. While there’s a stranger between my legs.
  • Okay, now, why does she want to know how often do I have sex?
  • WHY? Am I pregnant?!
  • No, that’s impossible. It’s been too long. Maybe I’m the next mother Mary.
  • She just casually said she’s going to feel up my ovaries. CASUALLY.
  • I hate this. I want to go home.
  • She actually shoved two latex gloved fingers inside me.
  • This is NOT fun.
  • Okay done.
  • No, turned out she was kidding. That b*tch.


Image source: tvrecappersanonymous

  • Boob feeling time. Kill me. NOW.
  • Why is she kneading them? It f*cking hurts!
  • I wish my gynecologist was a hot guy.
  • No, that’d be VERY weird.
  • Okay. It’s over. Finally.
  • She says I am healthy and good to go, yay!
  • Please don’t give me any sex advice, please. Uh oh, it’s happening.
  • Bye… forever.


Image source: Giphy

No matter how much we dread it, we do it. For the good of US.

Sucks. But don’t forget your half-yearly appointment.

Featured image source: huffpost

Article Name
34 Thoughts Every Woman Has When Visiting Her Gynecologist
Because a gynecologist scares us much like The Shining!
Amrin Talib

Amrin Talib

I am a brunette and an egalitarian. I love good food, cats, dogs, and books. I love to write, along with being an adrenaline junkie who hopes to travel the world someday. I have a cat named Duck.