We have all been there – going through a meltdown after a hard breakup and doing some insane stuff that we can then look back and laugh at. According to psychological research, the stages we go through when faced with grief and sorrow are – denial (“this cannot be happening to me”), anger (“why is this happening to me”), bargaining (“if this gets better, I’ll do this”), depression (“I’m low because it happened to me”) and acceptance (“I get it…and I accept what happened”).
But when it comes to heartbreak from intense breakups, these 5 stages seem ridiculously insufficient! Here are 20 stages of breakup to achieve acceptance, based on our intense research
Suggested read: 10 vital lessons to take away from breakups
1. Immediately after the breakup, a few weeks pass in great distress and intense loneliness, as it is hard to fill the void. This is usually characterized by gross sobbing and uncontrolled tear duct activation.
2. Moment of truth 1 – “Now you are a free bird and good to do anything with your life!” This usually comes after being sick of sobbing.
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5. You cry out loudly, stop socializing, and cancel all outings that involve human interaction, with or without alcohol. Fall in love with your room and get attached to your bed, leaving only for bodily functions, if at all.
6. Your friends figure out that you are still grief struck and might kill yourself. So they come along and try talking to you about how it was for the best and that your ex was useless anyway. Although the words seem nice, it does not work.
7. Then comes the snapping point. When it becomes unbearable and you want to have any form of contact with your ex, you give missed calls or leave empty messages or ping them on WhatsApp. But when they do respond, you act all cold and rude as if it was a mistake.
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8. As curiosity about your ex’s life overcomes you, you try and find out about how they are doing through your common friends or other sources…
9. …only to find out that your ex is over you and appears to be having a blast. While seeing other people.
10. Autosuggestion at work. You try to make yourself feel good by telling yourself that you too can find someone in this wide world.