We modern women have been trying to change the patriarchal system in which we had been living in, and have established ourselves as a force to be reckoned with. As a result, we have become much more empowered and aware of our position in society. “Independence” is a word that has become synonymous with this movement to establish equality between the genders, and every self-respecting and ambitious woman looks for self-sufficiency in their lives.
In fact, women who are willing to be in a relationship are not afraid of being without one. They are individuals on their own merit, and the presence of a man is not required to validate their existence. That does not, however, make them misandrous, relationship-phobic, heartless career machines. It’s just that the manner in which an independent woman is seeking her perfect man has also undergone a radical change, and there is a whole new list of things that they are looking for from a significant other.
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Here are just 10 examples of things she no longer waits for her perfect man to do for her:
1. Going out on dates
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You might be thinking that the quintessential idea of a date is to have fun with your better half. However, as a modern woman, you don’t need a man to splurge on yourself, dress up, and have the time of your life. If you’ve had a great day, celebrate it with a fancy dinner at a fancy restaurant, or go watch a movie that you had been planning to watch for a really long time. It could be with close ones, family, or even on your own – a man is the last thing you need in this respect. Sure, it feels good to share your joy or your sadness with someone else, but dates need not be exclusively reserved with a table for two.
2. Having a reason to look sexy
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The last thing you should be doing is waiting for the perfect man so that you can look sexy. If you think sexy lingerie and racy clothes should be bought only when you have a man to show off to, then think again. More than looking good, it is important to feel good, and when you buy appropriate clothing for the occasion with only yourself in mind, the level of satisfaction is limitless. Also, leaving lingerie shopping to a man is a disaster in the making, because it is likely that they will get you the most ridiculous outfits in order to see you enact their own fantasies. Do not, I repeat, do not let your sexiness become dependent on a man’s presence.
3. Buying jewelry
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Does the stereotypical image of a gasping woman being presented with a box of diamonds pop into your mind? Well, thankfully, women have started to bust the stereotype, because they don’t need a man to buy them their bling. Ladies, even if you are in a relationship with Mr. Right, there is no need to drop subtle hints when it comes to purchasing the necklace you saw in the shop window. If you like it, take it. If he does get you things, good for you. If he doesn’t, then you get to choose your own sparkles and flaunt it! The satisfaction of telling your friends that you bought your own ring just because you liked it is unparalleled.
4. Enrolling in classes and crash courses
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Whether it is cooking, horse riding, or dancing, you don’t have to drag your partner to your classes when it comes to learning a new skill. Anne Hathaway in Bride Wars was determined to work on her “couple style” with Chris Pratt, but we all know how that ended – not nicely. If you want to dance, there is no need to wait for a partner, because you alone could rock the dance floor. Even if you need someone to go with you, you can drag a friend along. The modern woman does not need to depend on a man to help her enhance herself as a person through these lessons, whether she is in a relationship or not.
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5. Having him do ‘manly’ jobs
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Now, women certainly don’t have to worry about whether they can do things only men are supposed to be able to do. Not only are women professionally and emotionally independent from men, but they also have the potential to be physically independent as well. From tasks as simple as changing the light bulb and cleaning the gutter, to fixing the car, women are competent to accomplish all this by themselves. They are rid of the psychological dependence and lack of confidence, and can put their competence to their advantage.
6. Going on a honeymoon
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You don’t need a husband or even a man in order to go on the honeymoon of your dreams. If you have the strength, the will, and the resources to go on a holiday, then don’t let the absence of a man in your life put a stopper on your plans. You don’t even have to wait for your man to surprise you with a honeymoon destination. The benefit of going on a holiday on your own is that you can do whatever you want, not having to pretend to appreciate the art in some obscure museum when all you want to do is explore the flea markets.
7. Receiving help for your own career
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Whether it is getting a job or starting your own business, as a modern woman, you can do it all without waiting for a man to help you out. Women are becoming self-sufficient in more than one respect, and they are becoming more and more independent professionally as well. Previously, connections and sources were required when women wanted to get prestigious jobs that paid well. Now, the role of men when it comes to female employment and empowerment is becoming obsolete.
8. Painting everything with his last name
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You might be looking and waiting for the perfect man, but you don’t have to wait for his initials. More and more women are not taking on their husband’s last names after marriage. If you want to plaster your own initials on your furniture and bags and napkins and cutlery and towels, then go right ahead, because even if you do decide to take his name after you get hitched, there is no reason why you shouldn’t have things that are exclusively yours.
9. Raising children
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As a modern woman, it is important to understand changing societal norms and beliefs pertaining to gender. Previously, the popular notion was that without a man, a home was incomplete. The man of the family was the father and the husband, who played a pivotal and irreplaceable role in raising children. However, you no longer need a man to help raise children, or even to have children. Adoption is becoming increasingly common, and there is always surrogacy and sperm banks, which can eliminate the dependence on a man when it comes to building a family.
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10. Having a life of your own
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While looking and waiting for the perfect man with whom you are going to spend the rest of your life with, you also have to get on with your life. This is true especially for the modern woman in today’s context, because depending on a man for a happy life and expecting him to provide you with certain things is an old-fashioned idea. You can wait for the perfect man without waiting for all the other things that he supposedly brings with him. Go on dates with yourself, or even with your girlfriends, buy yourself gifts and presents, and don’t worry about shaving your legs and dropping food on your clothes all the time.
When you stop expecting certain things from a potential romantic partner, you become exceedingly self-sufficient and independent. Even when you get into a permanent relationship with a man, you retain your individuality. While being on the lookout for your better half is a very normal thing to do, modern women can work on their self-esteem and confidence without them. Not only does that make you feel more empowered, but also helps you handle current and future relationships better.
Featured image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License
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