Hello there, love-struck hearts. Here I am to detonate yet another bomb of relationship reality for you: our love adventures are not all hearts and roses, and you know it! Like everything else, relationships also have their highs and lows (especially the ones bonded with the most magical strings of commitment).
With all that said, here are some of the challenges of committed relationships that are really a tough deal, so have at it! Relate, take comfort from the fact that you’re not the only one, and finally, do something about it.
Suggested read: 10 real reasons why relationships are hard
1. Staying committed!
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Actual commitment is and always will be the greatest catch of every committed relationship. They say that the grass is always greener on the other side, so when you are single, the very thought of a long term togetherness sounds exhilarating. But know one thing; it’s only sweet as long as you are enjoying the tempting smell from the other side. As soon as you step in the hot zone, the real taste may change your perception. (Well, the challenge here is accepting the dish on a daily basis in spite of your familiarity with the taste!)
2. Letting the handful of excitement grains slip away
Believe it, for it is true. Excitement and fun are the very threads that bind all the elements of your relationship together. You absolutely must make sure that you never let go of the passion that you feel for each other. Whether in a committed relationship or not, a little excitement is all that you need to keep the flames of love burning. The real trouble is when that element of surprise and thrill starts to fade away over time. So, get your creative side up and give it your best shot to never lose hope. Good luck!
3. The possibility of monotony
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Let me put it in the simplest way I can. What I’m talking about here is the boredom, which is practically inevitable when we are talking about remaining committed in a relationship. The period where the mysteries about each other are unveiling is sure sweeter and more delightful than any other. But the problem starts when there’s nothing more to figure out! It sounds a little negative (which, it is) but let me give you a reality check. It’s going to happen eventually. So, enough with the loathing, better start figuring out a solution for the situation.
4. The irresistible lure of so much more that could be!
This is something that you just can’t overlook. No matter how deep in love you are now, you’re only human at the end of the day. The dissatisfaction with what you have comes as naturally to your mind as breathing. So, wonder why’s that a challenge here, right? The trouble is that it gets nearly impossible to stay satisfied with everything in your committed relationship when you’re caught up in the cruel game of wanting more. Understand that loyalty is the key to happiness and these temporary phases of lures will pass just fine.
5. The nagging voice shouting ‘what ifs’ constantly in your head
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Oh, life is not always its most benevolent self. So, a very common and extremely painful challenge in a committed relationship is the influx of ‘what ifs.’ All of your regret and guilt can find its way out of the remote prison of your mind as sheer agony from your heart. I suggest that you keep yourself from cooking up different scenarios in your head and put yourself out there to revel in the pleasure of the love of your real life.
6. The near impossibility of curbing temptations!
Temptation is a b*tch! Be it the lure of the materialistic like fame, success, luxury, beauty or the magnetism of spirituality, know that it is always going to be there. The choices you make are the only things that will make resistance possible for you.
7. The double trouble when the reality keeps on drifting far and far away from your dreamland
Now, this is the stupidest but the most realistic challenge of all. It’s not your fault; I only blame all of these top-of-the-world romances in the movies and books that plant the (highly unrealistic) bug of love in your hearts. You dream and desire, but when has real life been anything remotely like the candy land of our rainbow-y imagination? Just suck it up, and learn to treasure what you have!
Suggested read: 15 secrets to a satisfying monogamous relationship
8. The ‘How much’ meter of love beep “Not enough, not enough!”
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Call it a trouble or call it a challenge, but this one will always going to be the mess of your own making. The lame questions starting with the ‘how much…’ are sure to spoil every relationship. They are nothing but the reflection of your own insecurities and false expectations, and they bring you nothing more than hurt. Know that you are better off without these because love just can’t be measured.
9. Forgetting to go from ME to WE
This is the time where the sharing lessons from our mama start biting off our own toe. There is no I and Me in any relationship, only Us and We! In other words, there is nothing ‘yours’ or ‘mine’ in a relationship; it’s only ‘ours’ and ‘mine’! And how can this feel anything less than the challenge of your life?
10. When the little unwelcome sourness pops in your otherwise sweet delight
When you dream of love and plan your committed relationship, it’s all hearts and unicorns. What you miss entirely is the inevitable possibility of some troubles. Yes, your understanding, chemistry, will, and capability to stand for each other matters a lot. So when the troubles show up, don’t get scared and shy away. Give each other the courage and inspiration to face them together!
11. The inevitable stab of change
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The only constant in this world is change. One day you realize that in the journey of your relationship, the person you once knew and loved to death has somehow transformed into a different person. But know that you can too (and you probably already have as well!). The key is never losing sight of what you love most and always making your lover love you more and more by being the awesome person that you are.
12. When the truth dawns upon you that the two of you are actually different
Don’t worry, it’s not just you. There are so many of us out there who are not perfectly sculpted for our partners. You can be different from each other, but that’s not anything to sulk about. Learn to the love the imperfections and differences in your partner; after all, that differentness was what made you love them in the first place, right?
13. The pinch of reality when the desires you crave for come wrapped in your responsibilities
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Everything in this world has two sides (and don’t you forget that!). So, when the pleasures of companionship come with some responsibilities, why do you keep complaining about it? Just let go of what you think is right and let yourself out of your comfort zone. Because when you give in to the responsibility of your relationship, nothing feels better than the little things that you get to do for each other!
Suggested read: 12 signs you’re in a committed relationship
14. Ah! When you realize that you’ve entered the ‘No U-Turn’ zone
One of the biggest challenges that a couple in a committed relationship faces is knowing that it’s not easy to just call it quits. You’ve invested emotionally, physically, and intellectually into this relationship, and built a whole life together with your partner. It just isn’t simple enough to break it off by walking out the door.
Now that you have finally come to terms with the challenges of a committed relationship, don’t you think it’s about time that you put in your best of efforts to face them? So, just hang in there and get ready to fight these relationship challenges together.
Featured image source: Shutterstock
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