Our moms are the best thing to have ever happened to us. Whether it’s the endless stream of love or the yummy ‘maa ke haath ka khana’ or simply, bargaining with the shopkeeper to get us four tops instead of two, she knows all the tricks to keep the curves on our lips facing up!
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And yet, there are times when the mom-knows-it-all approach backfires. Coz damn the bargaining skills- moms just don’t confine it to shopping and shopping alone!
1. Me: My friends are planning a sleepover.
Me: MOM! A night stay at a friend’s place.
Mom: But you hang out with them all day. Where’s the need for a sleepover?
Me: But Maaa… it’s her birthday.
Mom: All the more reason to give her some time to be with her family on that day!
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2. Me: Could you give me some money?
Mom: What did you do with your pocket money? And what do you need it for?
Me: I am going to see a movie with friends.
Mom: Watch it when it comes on TV in 2 months.
3. Me: Can I please get a new pair of jeans?
Mom: Another one! You already have so many.
Me: But all my friends have these cool ripped jeans and I want a pair too! Plus, they are on sale.
Mom: Well, all your other friends also get good grades, you never seem to want one of those!
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4. Me: Hey mom, I was calling to ask if I could come home a little late, the presentation is taking longer than I thought.
Mom: Do it tomorrow during the day.
Me: But it has to be submitted tomorrow!
Mom: Oh. In that case, get your friend home and finish it here.
5. Me: My friends are organizing a Diwali card party, can I please go?
Mom: Diwali is not until 2 weeks.
Me: Yeah, but people start throwing the parties almost two weeks in advance.
Mom: And you have to go to each one? Never saw you start studying for exams even 2 days ahead!
Me: Mom, pleaaaaase…
Mom: Will you help me with Diwali cleaning when you get back?
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Me: Huh… umm… yeah… okayyyy…
6. Me: Mom, could you please help me find my pink sweater?
Mom: It must be in your closet, look carefully!
Me: I’ve looked everywhere. Could you please help?
Mom: Fine. And while I look, you clean your room.
7. Me: Mom, I need a bigger internet pack…this one runs out in the middle of the month.
Mom: It’s because of all the facebooking you do!
Me: I swear, mom, I need it for school work.
Mom: Fine. But for that you will have to accept my friend request on Facebook first.
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8. Me: Please tell him (brother) to give up the TV, it’s my turn now!
Mom: Why should I take sides? Figure out between the two of you.
Me: Please, Mom!
Mom: Okay. But later in the evening when I make a case for a new ring to your dad, you have to take my side. Deal?
9. Me: Mom, my class is going for a trip. Could I go too?
Mom: You just went for a trip 2 months back. How many trips does your school go for?
Me: This is the last one. I promise.
Mom: Last one of your life? I doubt it, so no.
Me: Last one of this year!
Mom: Like I expected. Still no. We are planning a trip to Haridwar. So you’ll just have as much fun there!
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10. Me: My friends are going to the mall. I am going too.
Mom: But you promised to get groceries for me.
Me: I’m sorry, this suddenly came up.
Mom: Don’t worry, take the grocery list, get them from the mall. Have fun!
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11. Me: Mom, I put a dent in dad’s car by mistake. Please save me!
Mom: And say what – the car went out for a joy ride by itself?
Me: You could always say I was home all day.
Mom: But that’s exactly what you haven’t done in years…
Me: Please mom, he’ll kill me!
Mom: Fine. But you won’t get any pocket money this month, it will go towards fixing the dent.
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12. Me: I’m thinking of getting red highlights in my hair.
Mom: What’s wrong with your hair?
Me: Nothing. I’m just bored of it. I have always had it, I want some change.
Mom: Well, I have always had the same husband. Do you ever hear me complaining?
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Argue with that… can you?
No? Thought so.
Moms, I tell you…
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