15 Ways To Be Happy By Giving Up These Things

by Shruti Fatehpuria · November 30, 2015

Life is obviously the most tangled mystery we’ll ever stumble upon. Aristotle said, ‘Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim, and end of human existence.’ This tells us that our grief and dullness stricken-souls need to find some ways to be happy or the ways to be happier at least!

Here I’ve got a wonderful list of 15 things you should consider giving up to increase your happiness and well-being.

1. Perfectionism

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Oh, trust me, I know how easy it is to get wrapped up in the need to be perfect. Take it from someone who’s been there and done that – perfection will not necessary yield you the fruit of satisfaction. And when you don’t have the soothing, everlasting, and most delicious taste of contentment to rejoice, even the perfectly perfect life can weigh you down. So, little Miss Perfect, it’s fine to just let some things go free and some ends go loose!

2. The ‘are they impressed’ meter

This is your life, meaning the benefits of the ‘rights’ and the setbacks of the ‘wrongs’ are going to be yours and yours ALONE. I simply can’t see where ‘what they think’ comes and fits in the picture. Everyone has their own lives to care about (if they are so eager and keen to). So, you just need to focus on what makes you and only YOU happy. (Just to be clear – in a ‘for-yourself’ way, and not the selfish ‘myself’ one)

3. Quit labeling and broaden your horizons (your unconditionally judgmental attitude, I mean!)

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I am just asking you to be a bit (okay, quite more) flexible in the ways you see and understand life. Categorizing and labeling things will only make it tough for you (tougher than it already is, ha!). Stop with the nonsensical thoughts such as ‘he’s way too hot for me’ or ‘only the vogue-perfect bodies are worth admiring.’ Enough! Know things can still be fine just the way they are and you won’t have to make such big deals out of them anymore. Phew!

4. Excuses (and quitting the blame game is implied, I guess)

You won’t get anything by making excuses. At the end of the day, you are responsible for your own life, nobody else. It might feel touch, but you need to focus on the bigger picture rather than getting your blood pressure up for trivial things. These trivial things might make you feel that it’s not worth it and you come up with excuses to placate yourself. But you’re only deceiving yourself. You need to let go of all the unnecessary burdens and find ways to be happy with your life. What I mean to say is neither excuses nor endless blame will make the changes you desire, so get your rear moving and make it happen!

5. Insecurities (again, with the need to control implied!)

I understand how difficult it can be to be the audience and not the star, but believe me, sometimes a relaxation like this is something you NEED! You don’t have to control everything – down to the last detail. Look, your happiness is crumbling under the excessive burden of insecurities you carry upon your shoulders. Believe in what goes around, comes around, and your good never goes unnoticed by the universe. So just do your bit and sit back, the world is an echo, and your reward will come reflecting back to your heart for sure.

6. Give up your clinginess to the past too much

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What could possibly be the point of holding onto something that’s not even here anymore? Wake up, folks; the past is gone and what you have is today. It is a gift, that’s why it’s called present, so focus on what have right now, and put in all your efforts toward making it blossom into something wonderful in the future. Stop clinging to what was (never yours) in the past. Believe me, it’s not even there anymore. It’s come and gone, now it’s just a ghost you’re clinging onto!

7. Expectations! (that’s a toughy, and even I know that!)

We see the world as we are; this is the only fault here. If you’re a talkative person, you will (quite naturally) want the people around you to make conversation, and if you are a lover of quiet, you’d prefer your fellows to bless you with silence. It all depends on you letting go of something. So, stop choosing the responses you get and wanting what reactions you deserve; revel in the unknown and you’ll find happiness in the curious wonders of possibilities.

8. The never ending laments (while you’re complaining about the stuff that’s going wrong, you’re missing out on what is meant for you!)

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Open your eyes for life is full of changes and it certainly doesn’t follow a screenplay written by you! (Sorry for being rude, but someone had to say it, right?) Pain and pleasure are both important in their own ways, and each one completes and gives meaning to the other. Without darkness we can never appreciate the light, so stop with the complaints and only then you will be able to enjoy the simplest but most important gifts of life.

9. Regrets and resentments (they only weigh you down!)

If happiness is in the North, resentments are the cart pulling you slowly and stumbling down South. Happiness is meant to lift you towards the bliss and the raw essence of life, while holding on to past regrets and resentments will only push you deeper into the gutter of sorrows. Resentments get old, regrets lose meaning, revenge sucks the life out of you, so you need to prevent this irreparable damage to your beautiful spirit right now.

10. Dependence (or call it – believe that, yes, you CAN do it!)

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Yes people, you’re good enough. Self-pity and your habit of thinking so little of yourself are likely to repel others. So, TRASH that attitude already. Follow Lady Gaga and REPEAT (yes, I really mean it), ‘I’m beautiful in my way, ‘cause God makes no mistakes, I’m on the right track, baby I was born this way!’ Very nice. Now, just trust yourself and give all your best in all of your efforts and there’s no denying that you CAN do it.

11. Drum rolls…ATTACHMENT! Tada (there, I said it!)

Perhaps the most fundamental root cause of a lot of pain and misery is attachment! Every saint and every philosopher agrees with the notion in one way or other, but I (neither a saint, nor a philosopher) firmly believe that it is also our only tie to this world. I won’t ask you to give up attachment, but I’d very much like you to start being judicious on who and what you get attached with instead. Attachments formed due to obligation and under duress do not last, and they very well shouldn’t. You need to figure out which ones buoy you up and which ones weigh you down.

12. Your nagging need to KNOW (and the aftermath of over-analyzing)

Overthinking and looking too far into the future will only make you depressed and anxious. Just understand that there are things not meant for you to know (or at least not just yet), so don’t rush and let the mystery in life warm and open up to you itself. Nothing feels sweeter!

13. Those endless and meaningless waits for THE RIGHT MOMENTS

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The only ‘right’ moment is the one you are living in right now. So I suggest you forget the idea that the ‘right’ moment for anything will come knocking on your door one day. The only destiny is what we create with our thoughts and believe with our hearts, so buckle up and make the moment in your hand the perfect and the most meaningful one.

14. Taking things for granted, of course!

We never know for sure what will happen in the future, so we shouldn’t take our time and life for granted. Whatever you have in hand and whatever you have within reach, make the most of it. If you wish to ask why, then I’d just answer – because you never know.

Suggested read: 10 things a REAL man wants in a woman

15. Lastly, your NEED to be HAPPY!!!

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A happy life is what we all want, and to be happy is the only (however underrated) and the greatest aim of our life. Being happy is never a choice, but a need, and a rather pressing one that we not only want to address but also owe to ourselves to fulfill. So, all I can ask you after all of these bright and enlightening talks is just that YOU are the most important thing there is; the treasure of the universe and the precious responsibility toward yourself. So, just this once, think, feel, and react just for yourself, and I promise you that this is one of the best ways to be happy! Cheers!

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Summary