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Is Sex Among the Things That Get Better With Age?

Things that get better with age

Is a healthy physical relationship reserved for the ‘young ones’ alone? At least, this is what most people think, right? Well, we will tell you how wrong these folks are, and yes, we have surveys to support us! :)

According to one poll conducted on more than 2000 people in the United States, it was shown that men and women tend to get better in bed with age. The report found that men and women become very confident in bed once they cross the 50-year mark, the so-called ‘silver age’. As one gets older, they become more relaxed because they now look at making love as fun and not stressful! Intimacy, therefore, is one of the things that gets better with age!

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The Men

To put it succinctly, men start worrying less. You may be conscious of the odd grey hair and the laughter lines, but you are not worried about the fact that you are getting old as much as your significant other does. It was shown in a poll that only 34 percent of men are concerned about the various physical signs of growing older, compared to more than 50 percent of women! The sample also suggested that the word associated with men that have grey hair is “distinguished’!

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Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License

How does all this affect one’s performance in the bedroom? For a start, this shows men are not very self-conscious in bed, which allows them to be free and enjoy the whole experience. As we grow older, we don’t feel the need to always flaunt our best side and be our best selves. Hiding the wobbly bits is out of the question! “Take me the way I am and if not, I’ll know you cannot handle awesome,” is the motto!

The other bright side to this is that partners tend to spend long hours together, making efforts to ward off the ravages of time. In some cases, it’s been found that people start looking better than they ever did because they are so relaxed and at ease. Research even advocates that what we call the ‘cougar’ phenomenon is motivated by a confusion that is subconscious: Men tend to be attracted to women with long and healthy locks, clear skin, and dazzling eyes which are increasingly found in women who are older.

The Women

As women age, they become more sensual. The New Hite Report that was conducted in 2000, says that older women enjoy the female climax more than younger women. The Pennell study conducted in the subsequent year found that the capacity of women to climax also increases with age. Health Plus magazine carried out the National Over 45 Sex Survey which showed that older women tend to get more adventurous, trying out new things in bed! Roughly 89 percent admitted that they liked changing positions and locations. Some even cited the garden as a possible location! A majority of the women claimed that their physical relationship with their partner was better in their 40s than it had ever been! All this also puts forward the idea that women become more comfortable in their intimate relationships during their 40s.

It takes two to tango!

couple in bed_New_Love_Times

Image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License

If your partner is enjoying the experience more, it is likely that you will enjoy it more too! If one is satisfied, the other will likely feel appreciated and will do even better in bed!

It has also been found that as one ages, they tend to get physically close only when they are in a secure, long term relationship. Sounds boring in comparison to one-night stands? Well, research says, a more gratifying sexual experience only comes from marriage or long term companionships.

Julia Coles, a relationship counselor and sex expert says, “The idea that wild sex means sex with a stranger is a myth. The most important element of a fulfilling sex life is trust.”

Age just a number?

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Image source: Shutterstock

As your 20s leave you, your attitude is no longer (pardon the expression) “wham, bam, and thank you ma’am”! David Schnarch, a therapist, says that physical prime may give you stamina, but intimacy is a mind game too, which comes with maturity. Being too impulsive will only make you insecure! This sexual maturity only comes after 40s because you are more aware of who you are, what your likes and dislikes are, and you are not in any way afraid to talk about it. After turning 40, you bring the best combination of stamina and experience, which makes sex one of the things that get better with age.

Harvard Medical School research says that while 20-somethings involve themselves in more activity between the sheets, the 40-somethings show equally high rates of pleasure. In simpler words, intimacy becomes an enjoyment only once you are 40-plus years old. So the great news is that whether you have just started or have been there for quite some time now, the best is indeed yet to come!

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Benefits of sex as you grow older

The things that have brought you immense joy in your life might be your kids and your career. But as an older adult, these things might not be as prevalent in your daily life. The relationship that you share with your partner often takes on a more significant role, and sex, quite naturally, becomes a vital way of connecting. The following are the benefits of sex as one ages:

1. Improvement in mental and physical well-beingSex not only burns fat, but also causes the brain cells to release endorphins, which drastically reduces anxiety.

2. Increase in lifespan. Because of its health benefits, a healthy sex life can actually add years to one’s life.

3. Strengthen relationships. Sex gives people a chance to express intimacy and strengthen their deepest relationships.

4. Come home to me! Making love gives you an opportunity to free yourself from the shackles of everyday harsh realities and feel at home just being with someone. It gives you refuge!

How does one learn to accept and celebrate themselves the way they are?

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Image source: Shutterstock

The fundamental reason why sex is among the things that get better with age is that people tend to accept and celebrate themselves as they age. But how? We have some tips.

Sex in later years is not the same as when one is young. This does not necessarily have to be a bad thing! Embracing one’s older identity makes things way easier! Some people tend to shy away from the experience when there’s no reason to! The main reason behind this is that they feel embarrassed either of their “old bodies” or “bad performance”. These tips will help you let go of the fear!

1. You can reap all the benefits of experience!

The self-confidence and the freedom that comes with age are very attractive to your partner or potential partners. It does not matter whether you are a man or a woman, you may very well feel more confident about your body at 60 than you did at 20! It is also more likely that you will know more about yourself now and what excites you in bed, making the whole deal more pleasurable!

couple in bed_New_Love_Times

Image source: Shutterstock

2. The road ahead.

As you grow older, you tend to let go of the expectations of a happy sex life. You must stop living in the past and dwelling on how good things were when you were a different age! Life should be lived here and now, and there is no need to slow down on your sexual escapades. A positive outlook and an open mind will help you go a long way in advancing your sex life as you grow older.

3. Learn to love yourself!

Don’t think of yourself in terms of being young or old, but rather in terms of old and new. Every day you are your newer self, not your older! 😉 Yes, your body will be going through lots of changes, you will look different and you will definitely feel different. But if you take things as they come and hold your head as high as possible, you will feel attractive no matter your age! It is confidence coupled with honesty that gathers the respect of other people. This respect soon changes to attraction!

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Not just better but safer!

As a responsible adult and much older too, you are more likely to engage in safer sex, especially if you are in a long term relationship. You may not get pregnant, but you are still susceptible to various sexually transmitted diseases. You will be mature enough to talk about all this easily with your partner and through that save each other from any pain and trouble.

Sex is a powerful emotional and physical experience. It is also one of the best tools to protect and improve health, and it definitely keeps getting better with age! After you turn 50, sex presents some challenges and it’s easy to get discouraged with the aging process creeping in. However, those problems are manageable. With a better understanding and an open mind, one can enjoy physical and emotional bliss without a shadow of an ‘age,’ because age is only a state of mind!

Featured image source: Shutterstock

Article Name
Is Sex Among Things That Get Better With Age?
A healthy sex life is essential for your relationship to thrive. But contrary to popular belief, it is one of those things that get better with age!
Ruth Russell

Ruth Russell

‘To be or not to be’ if that’s the question, I would always want to be who I am – a lover, who binges on ‘Breakfast at Tiffany’s’ every Christmas; that is, if she decides not to wallow in bed with ‘Wuthering Heights’! The other thing that I absolutely love is weddings! Well, who doesn’t like being in a room full of love stories, eh?!