When people make ridiculous blanket statements like ‘all men are dogs’ or ‘all men cheat’ in the face of situations that involve infidelity or betrayal of some kind, I get irked no end. Whilst infidelity is certainly all pervasive, it isn’t monopolized by a gender. And in no way does its presence imply that ALL men or ALL women can be conveniently clubbed into the ‘cheaters category’ owing to a scattered dispersion of ever-so-common cheating experiences.
Before any of these ridiculous statements roll by you (or should you happen to utter them!!), read on to find out about all the reasons why real men never cheat, which are as interesting as the reasons why men cheat:
1. He values love over a fleeting experience
Unlike lust, love is not a momentary lapse of judgment. A real man would not jeopardize his long-term commitment for a transient pleasure. When two people love each other and are committed to making it work, they can weather any storm. A flimsy one-night stand or temporary arrangement of convenience will never fill in for the several other layers of fulfillment that an emotionally rich and healthy relationship provides.
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2. He has evolved beyond his primal urges
Whilst one may blame a man’s biological urges for the step, DNA is not really the factor. Much like infidelity, monogamy is a choice too. A real man knows better than hopping in the sack with a woman he, most likely, never will have any deep connection with. A real man has the ability to fight his primal urges in respect of the ‘choice’ he has made to be loyal.
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3. He respects the woman in his life
Casting someone else’s feelings aside for something that you seek outside the ambit of the ‘commitment’ you made is disrespect. A real man would never do that. Cheating involves betrayal and breaking your partner’s trust. A man who respects the woman in his life is the reason why real men do not cheat.
4. He’d never hurt the woman he loves
Not only does respecting one’s partner play a huge role in defeating one’s impulse to cheat, but the love for her should be able to vanquish all your ‘primal urges’ any day.
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5. He treasures the world he has built with the woman he loves
A real man knows what it means to have found a ‘home’ in a person and he’d never ever risk the ‘world’ he has built with the person who is ‘home’ to him. The stakes are just too high and he will never bet it all for a flimsy experience that does not even hold a candle to his ‘blissful life.’
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6. He respects himself
C.S. Lewis said, “Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.” A fear of getting caught should not be the driving force behind resisting the urge to cheat. A real man would not cheat even if he were promised that nobody would find out. This is because he respects himself enough to uphold the promises he made to his better half.
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7. He knows what’s important in life
And it certainly isn’t a different booty. Period.
8. He is emotionally stable
Most men have a somewhat self-destructive method of dealing with their emotional crises. While women tend to find a release in crying, complaining or discussing it with friends, men would find the final release of their ‘bottled-up’ emotions in an indulgence – be it alcohol, drugs or something to f**k. A real man knows better than to channel his release in this direction.
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9. He has enough willpower to keep his junk in his pants
While biology may well dictate otherwise, a real man knows better than to thrust his man-meat anywhere that is willing. He has considerable willpower and strength of character to refuse even the most blatant of advances.
10. He respects his vows and keeps them
A real man is a promise-keeper. He knows that the pledge he makes to his partner is something that his future self shall be able to uphold at all times. And he very well follows through.
11. He is happy with himself and his life
A real man does not seek validation for himself and his self-worth outside of his own being. As such, he is happy with himself and is happier still with the ‘choices’ he has made in life. Any disregard to the ‘choice’ he has consciously made, kept and sustained shall not be thrown away for a transient experience.
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12. He knows to differentiate the forgivable from the not-so-much
Cheating is not an accident. You can never justify this transgression. After all, your man-meat just doesn’t slip and get into a woman all by itself. A real man knows what such a grievous act of betrayal entails for his commitment and would never do anything to put his ‘world of love’ in jeopardy. That is why good guys don’t cheat.
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13. He knows that ‘scores’ aren’t a reflection on his masculinity; integrity and loyalty are
For the last time, it isn’t laudable to get laid as many times and with as many partners as possible. A real man knows this and does not define his manhood/masculinity or self-worth by the number of notches added to his bedpost. In fact, he is happy being fiercely loyal to the woman he loves.
14. He is mature enough to address the issues in his relationship without straying
No, he does not take the easy way out. If his relationship is plagued by issues of some kind, he takes out time to face them head-on instead of slipping out the back door for getting ‘some on the side.’
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15. He knows that ‘monogamy’ is a choice and he chooses it, proudly
A real man, though well aware of the prejudices and hegemonic dominance involved with the cultural script of monogamy, values the intricacies of a ‘committed dynamic.’ He makes the ‘choice’ to be loyal and does so ever-so-more proudly.
16. He is accountable to his conscience
Cheating on someone you love and then hiding it with a web of intricate lies and deception by pretending that all is great is an incredibly challenging task, I believe. At least, to those with a conscience. So, real men don’t opt for this.
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17. He upholds the ideals that come with ‘commitment’
Commitment isn’t just a mere label to a real man. A real man knows that declaring a commitment verbatim in front of family and friends, and living it are two separate things. He ensures he follows through on both.
18. He fears ‘losing’ his all
The loving world that he has built with the ‘one woman’ he adjudged is ‘the one’ for him is too precious to throw away on a whim. He fights any impulse that may cause him to stray because he cannot afford to lose the invaluable treasure he has.
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19. He knows what he ‘really wants’
And that’s ‘love.’ Need I say more?
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20. And also, he has seen Fatal Attraction
Uhh, what can I say. I know it doesn’t quite flow with the list, but it definitely holds. Plus, I wanted to round it off with a smile.
There you go – all the reasons why real men do not cheat!! Now, never utter another blanket statement like ‘all men cheat,’ ‘all guys are cheaters!’
Coz honestly, they are not!
Featured image source: Google, copyright-free image under Creative Commons License